Avoiding ‘Brain Rats’ and Regaining Your Focus (& Sanity)

This month’s quote: “We become what we think about all day long.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

So much has been happening in my world, both personally as well as behind the scenes of Families Blossoming, over this past month, that I have often felt like a dog chasing my tail (mentally and physically). At times, I truly didn’t know if I was coming or going but rather felt like my inner autopilot was working overtime!

I’ve had a continuous barrage of thoughts and questions coming into my head at all times of the day and night.

For example:

Am I doing the right thing as a parent, spouse, person?
Does the work that I do sense?
How is Alejandro going to weather his latest surgical procedure?
How am I going to handle his new home therapist (whom I have yet to confirm) and his new teacher?

I feel like my husband and I have been more like ships passing in the night due to both of our work schedules, I’m feeling nervous and a bit scared!

Do we have enough money to do x,y & z?
How do I handle the constant questions from family and friends (& even strangers) about Alejandro’s blindness and overall development?

I don’t know how to do___ (any number of things), I am feeling sluggish, tired and a bit off spiritually, I need to sleep but can’t….and on and on it goes.

How about you?

Do you feel like your mind is racing sometimes?

Have you felt like every thought, worry and/or fear imaginable about your current situation has taken up permanent residence in your head?

Do you sometimes feel like you are truly going insane (or at least dancing along the periphery of sanity)?

If so, then you like me, have been experiencing ‘Brain Rats’! This off-the-wall but very truthful phrase comes from Barbara McAfee, www.barbaramcafee.com, a wonderful and energetic women I had the pleasure of meeting during an International Coaching Federation conference last December in Orlando, Florida. She was the MC for the conference and livened up every single one of the keynote addresses with her lively blend of truth via song. Her song ‘Brain Rats’ is a true testament to how much junk we let run around in our heads constantly….just like little rats scurrying around.

I was definitely having a serious dose of ‘brain rats’ this past month and spent countless hours thinking about, being fearful of and worrying over things that either I couldn’t and/or didn’t need to change or things that I could change but just needed to give myself permission to do (and I wasn’t). I was fretting instead of taking action. I’m sure many of you have had your own dose of ‘brain rats’ not only this month but throughout your journey as a special parent.

So this month, I want to share with you two (2) ways to help you become mentally rat-free or at least minimize their scurryness (is this a word?:-) in your heads.

rat trap image 1) Set mental rat-traps – This requires some planning. You wouldn’t haphazardly put down rat traps in your home, but rather you would strategically place them where you think you will have the most success with trapping the rats. Likewise, you need to mentally plan beforehand what you will do when thoughts that won’t help you move forward in any way keep running around in your head. Would you entertain them for a little while or not at all? Although I know that at times, it is tempting to do the 1st, but I would strongly suggest the latter. As this month’s quote reminds us, ‘we become what we think about all day’, so if you are thinking that you will be anxious about something, then it’s highly likely that you will be.

Humane rat-traps or cages are designed to capture the rat, without killing it, so that you can quickly remove it from your surroundings and release it elsewhere. In the same manner, don’t destroy yourself but when your brain rats’ thoughts emerge, trap or stop them immediately- then let them go. The last part of this is key – let them go. What purpose would holding onto these thoughts serve you?

2) Avoid linear thoughts – Due to their poor vision and depth perception, rats tend to stay very close the wall and edges of rooms when they are scurrying about. This helps them know where they are in their environment. You must help them get lost! Don’t let your thoughts be linear or one-dimensional but rather a myriad of possibilities. Instead of thinking of only one possibility to a challenge you may be having, think about five (5). The more options you consider, the more in control you feel because your world is no longer one of simply either / or but rather one of endless possibilities.

Be sure to not let these ‘endless possibilities’ become more brain rats though. Sometimes we can think of so many good possibilities that we become overwhelmed and don’t do any of them. To prevent this from happening, have a good think about how you could realistically do three (3) out of the five (5) options. This helps to keep you focused and gives you a sense of direction.

So, I encourage you this month to actively work on being the best pest control expert with your thoughts, that you can be. They (and you) deserve to live in a rat-free environment and trust me, you and your sanity will thank you for it!

Special Parents Early birds

Now onto the ‘goodie’ I mentioned earlier.

Based on the type of support you said you wanted, as well as how you wanted to receive this support, I am so excited to announce that I’ve created an interactive online program that gives you exactly what you’ve asked for!

It’s called, ‘Special Parents, Special Solutions’ and it was designed to give you the clear guidance you wanted to help you effectively deal with concerns unique to special parents as well as an opportunity to connect with other special parents – all within a supportive environment.

Click on the image to find out more and to take advantage of my pre-launch Early Bird Special:

I hope you will join me (and other special parents) in this wonderful opportunity to grow and develop as both a special parent and an individual.

I look forward to ‘meeting’ you in this medium and connecting and supporting you in a much more direct and personal way.

As always, I would love to hear from you!

Share with me your thoughts on this month’s topic and of course, the ‘Special Parents, Special Solutions’ online program.

Warmly,

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